Fri, Aug 28, 2015
Ever notice someone in a meeting seems to command immediate attention when he or she speaks? Not just because of their rank but because of respect for their views when they choose to express them?
And when this happens, does it also seem that they seem wiser, more thoughtful, more centered, more articulate? They may not show up as the smartest or quickest. But they seem to get the big picture and have the ability to resolve conflict and move the group forward. Their very presence is calming.
The French have a phrase for this person: “eminence grise,” literally gray eminence or elder statesman, someone of high repute.
My CEO coaching clients may be successful leaders by most standards: set the right course, top-graded the team, created the climate for the best culture, opened communication channels, made tough decisions and saw the fruits of their labors in increased market position and earnings (and other ways). But the best of the best want to be more than strong leaders. They want to achieve gravitas which they can then apply as CEOs, board members or board chairs who can make a difference in their world beyond their companies.
What differentiates the person with gravitas from others?
EXPERIENCE AND STORY-TELLING
Some people capture the essence of each of their many experiences – translate them into lessons learned, take-aways and analogies for future use.
Some people’s passion for their industry or calling leads them to be voracious readers of articles and books with abstracts of other leaders’ stories. And they seem able to relate these stories when relevant to a conversation.
Some people are both privileged and able to have a ringside seat while other leaders create or tell their stories. And the ability to bring those stories to life at the right moment as well.
All of these become the mental library from which wise elders (some quite young) draw upon in conversations.
These same people may at times use the library to formulate better questions than others or make better suggestions than others. But the primary approach is to use the library to tell the right story at the right time in the right way.
I once heard a CEO introduce what he thought a relevant story in a management team meeting. Desiring to avoid coming off in a negative way, he described what another company had achieved outside their industry. He prefaced the story with this tale:
A rooster came to believe his hens were not as productive as they should be. He borrowed an ostrich egg and rolled it into the hen-house saying: “I am not complaining or criticizing, just showing you what is being done elsewhere”).
To get a bit more specific, these are the library sections for my industrial CEO clients:
PRESENCE AND BEHAVIORS
What makes a person seen as “senior,” wise, having gravitas, chairman-like?
That’s my view. What’s yours? I am truly interested in all comments and examples. I thought his post had already been published but was wrong. See also the prior post which should have followed this one.
Wed, Aug 26, 2015
In a prior post, I wrote about the “eminence grise,” the person you recognize immediately as having wisdom and gravitas. It is evident in the highly relevant, experience-based stories they tell, the penetrating questions, the ability to distill a complicated situation to the simplest core, their centeredness and calm under duress. They are broad-based thinkers, not just subject matter experts. They have a calming and salutary impact on everyone around them. When they speak, everyone listens. People treasure the time in their presence.
A LIVING DEMONSTRATION
The prior post spoke of how to recognize such a person and steps on the journey to become one. This post is a peek inside the Eminence Grise.
Jimmy Carter held a press conference earlier in August. He had only just been told that his cancer had spread to four areas of his brain. Whether or not you are a fan, he gave us a gift.
He told the attendees (as close to verbatim as I remember):
What more may we surmise is inside this most accomplished of former Presidents?
Carter was at that moment, by every observation, centered, calm and confident.
It was a rare glimpse inside the eminence grise. In my experience either observing them on stage or in conversation with the alone, these thoughts are contributors to that centeredness, calm, ease in moments on stage:
How long ago do we suppose President Carter reached this state of mind? I would speculate a long time ago. And I have seen leaders in their 40s to leaders in their 70s exhibit this state; and more than a few “senior” leaders as well as “newbies” easily triggered into non-constructive behaviors.
In a later post, I will return to steps along the journey and specific tactics for self-leadership.
There are some good books on various aspects of leadership maturity. Here are a few:
Leadership and the Art of Self-Deception by the Arbinger Institute
New Earth and other titles by Eckhart Tolle
Triggers by Marshall Goldsmith
All available on Amazon Books
That’s just my view. What’s yours?
Wed, Jul 1, 2015
These are my notes for an internet radio conversation this morning with Jim Blasingame, The Small Business Advocate, who is a treasure trove of advice for business owners.
Leaders often fear replacing people they know in their hearts must go.
I have been CEO coach in more than a few such situations. Often, there is a history of earlier performance and relationships that makes the boss hesitate well beyond the point where the enterprise risk of not acting is far greater than the risk of separation/termination.
Objections range from:
They are often derivatives of fear and just wrong.
Balaji Krishnamurthy, business consultant and former CEO, led a workshop with my Vistage peer advisory Board offered a way to think about this: assess the “life-chits” owed to such a person, decide if the person can be repositioned to a different job and, if not, determine the amount of severance and outplacement help which, if given, would allow the CEO to sleep at night.
Such a framework helped more than one member work his way through such a situation.
In some cases, a member of the senior team is the outlier and is actually toxic —dispiriting the senior team by negative comments, constant criticism and sometimes passive aggressive behavior or worse. Such a person cannot be repositioned. The longer the CEO turns a blind eye to the situation the more respect he loses and the more damage is done.
One such CEO knew the person in question for 20 years before hiring him two years ago. Their wives were friends. Henry, as we will call him, was deeply dissatisfied with the role assigned to Henry and with the company strategy. A series of efforts by the CEO to give Henry alternative roles and great counsel all failed to change Henry’s behavior. At this point, the CEO wrote his Intentional Leadership Agenda. I will address the content but first say that having completed his own, he asked each senior team member to prepare theirs, redacted sentences too sensitive to publish and distributed the documents among the senior team. They then had a meeting to review each other ILAs. It made absolutely clear that the toxic person was indeed an outlier on an otherwise unified team. A week later, the CEO arranged severance at life chit levels and took action to separate him from the company.
The senior team has been liberated, morale has soared and the team is on a roll toward higher performance.
Outline of an ILA (must be done in 3 or fewer pages), whether the CEOs or a senior team member:
1. A paragraph with your definition of your job (scope and major impact on the company
2. Your Legacy (what difference your having been in your job will make by the time you depart (a) in the minds and hearts and organizations affected by your presence, (b) in the results achieved and (c) in the positioning of the enterprise beyond where it is today)
3. Your leverage (the people through whom you will achieve your legacy) . Relationships (whom you must help and must help you and how)
4. Your presence (how you need to show up to achieve your legacy: roles played, engagement, enlistment, demeanor)
5. How and through whom you intend to find out how your are doing on this agenda
That’s just my view. What’s yours?
For more on this topic, visit:
Thu, Jun 11, 2015
GOOD CEOS ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS…DO YOU?
THE BOTTOM LINE
Questions can be more important than answers. Good CEOs know this. Among the questions: “What don’t I know that could kill me?” And “Am I pushing too hard or not hard enough?”
BUILT INTO MUSCLE MEMORY
It is NOT that they do it every day, just periodically. Good CEOs challenge their own assumptions and their own knowledge and routinely do it to others. They also imagine scenarios beyond those for which they are planning. “What if….” is a frequent question not only to test assumptions, strategy and plans but also how the organization may have to adapt in the face of change.
LEVELS OF QUESTIONS
In a meeting, if you ask for questions and allow “top of mind” responses you will often get superficial answers. If you ask each person to write down their top 2 or 3 best questions that go deepest to the situation at hand, then go around the table you will get richer answers.
There are workshops (including in my Vistage International community) which suggest an architecture to questions:
Level 1 questions elicit facts and known solutions.
Level 2 questions elicit elaboration of thinking and logic (or lack of it).
Level 3 questions reveal deeply held emotions (including fears), prejudices and more.
If this is of general interest, we may write a column with more granular insights into asking terrific questions. It is, after all what both leaders and coaches need to do all the time.
In 1988, Richard Neustadt and Ernest May wrote: “Thinking in Time, The Use of History for Decision-Makers.” I find it is timeless (no pun intended). Do I know all I could? How could I find out what i really need to know? Is the analogy in my head a good one or flawed? Let’s decide how to think about “this” before we decide “what to do about this.”
The book is still available on Amazon.com.
For more about the world’s best CEO membership organization, visit:
That’s just my view. What’s yours?
Thu, Jun 11, 2015
One of my CEO clients was asked by his P/E firm to present his view of what has made him a successful CEO in two different companies. The top line will come as no surprise to the experienced CEO:
In my view, this list also applies to companies that are founder-owned, employee-owned and public (with a few additions for publics).
I asked him how his own views had changed as a result of his gigs as CEO. This is his view:
I did not have any influence on his adding the last KSF which is clearly in my own interest. I will add that one of the other portfolio company CEOs commented on the nature of a coach he considers worthy: enough years of working with CEOs to recognize patterns in CEO behavior, business issues and the like and to be unflinching in challenging the CEOs assumptions, approaches and behaviors.
If you find this helpful, please tell your friends. If not, please tell me. If you wish to know more about any of the tools, just ask.
 A display of overall goals, initiatives and tasks which align to achieve the goals along with names of individuals responsible for each of these
Fri, Apr 10, 2015
EXTRAORDINARY LEADERS: It’s Not About the Horse, Part Two
In the prior post, we described the challenge of working directly with the horse and the immediate feedback and learning we received. The learning was surprisingly relevant to work and family.
The conversation with the handler was equally useful with what we will call “nuggets” worth considering (ask which of these applies to people, which apply to the boss and which to subordinates; enjoy grazing):
I asked the handler how they screen new handler candidates. “Easy, she said: we have them observe a session or two and ask them what they saw. And we then have them witness the group exchange afterward of what the guests learned. If they don’t get it, no way.”
I also asked their view of having both spirited horses who may fight with others and more easygoing animals. “We are ok with different temperaments as long as they do their job and don’t bite the guests.”
If you would like to read more, find Wyatt Webb’s books or better yet go to Miraval and have the equine experience.
That’s just my view. What’s yours?
Fri, Apr 3, 2015
Lessons from the Webb
At the wonderful Miraval Resort near Tucson, you can go to the stables and attempt to work with a horse (under the care of an expert). Try to get the horse to give you his hoof to clean. Sounds simple, right? You approach the horse, as instructed you reach down and pinch his leg, ready to hold it up and clean it with the pick in your other hand. Then nothing happens. The horse just stands there. You wonder: is the horse being stubborn?
You may have stated your intent to the horse – did he not hear you?
The wrangler then asks you a series of questions about your own behavior and underlying emotions. Were you tentative? Confused or uncertain? Worried? Fearful? If yes, the horse sensed it; and interpreted what he sensed as not a clear, strong command.
Or the horse may have picked up his hoof for a split second only to put it down almost instantly. Did you fail to support the hoof sufficiently, holding it firmly and high enough? Then the horse did not feel safe (on three legs) from falling down or needing to run away in case of predator and did not trust you.
When you did succeed, did someone try to take your picture? Did you look away at the camera for a moment? If you did, the horse put his hoof down though you were holding it. Horses do not accept multi-tasking. To risk their safety with you, they cannot afford anything but complete attention.
Now you are told to walk the horse around the circle holding the rope in your hands. Oops. You begin to walk and the horse stands still. Or you get him started but cannot get him to turn left or right. Or you want him to stop and he keeps walking. Or you walk and he stops.
Is it his training? His attitude on this day? Or did the horse not sense you looking in your intended direction, not see you walk before he felt the rope puling him? Or worse, did you really think you could lean against a 1200 pound animal to get him to turn?
And when you did not get what you want in either (1) or (2) above, what did your frustration lead you to do? Hopefully it was to try something different (the hind hoof first with a different approach?).
Whether you are the CEO wanting something from your Board, an alliance, or a key executive, the lessons should be clear. The horse worries about his safety and whether he should trust and respect you. He will do as you ask if you are clear in your intent and provide the support he needs to comply; if you signal where you want to go ahead of time, he will more likely buy in. The same lessons apply to the C-suite executive who wants something from the boss. And possibly in other relationships though I won’t speculate.
In the spirit of full disclosure, once in awhile the horse will not do the task even for the wrangler. And it may be about the horse or about the wrangler at that moment. And you should know that horses understand neither language nor voice-tone and are completely kinetic (physical) in their reading of you. Each human being has a dominant mode of taking information in: visual, auditory and kinetic. It helps to adapt.
If this story has you intrigued, then read the sequel, which I will publish in a week. It will have the full exposition of the take-aways from this vivid and somewhat surprising experience and a running conversation with the wrangler/therapist.
Wyatt Webb’s books are available on amazon:
That’s just my view. What’s yours?
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